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Part of series: Permission to Feel · Day 3 of 5

Emotional Resilience

We can only experience closeness with God when we open our hearts to him.

By Russ Ewell
4 min read
Emotional Resilience 1

01Read

“…Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

Ephesians 5:14 NIV

In December 1990, I watched a film called Awakenings. The movie is based on the true story of Dr. Oliver Sacks (called Dr. Malcolm Sayer in the film), a neurologist who discovered that the drug L-DOPA could “awaken” patients who had been catatonic for decades following the encephalitis epidemic of 1919–1930.

Even after ten years as a Christian, I was only beginning to understand my life—my personal psychology and the underlying truths shaping my choices for good or ill. The film inspired me because it showed what happens when someone awakens to reality after decades of unconsciousness.

What did this idea of “awakening” to the depths of my human nature teach me about myself and the world around me? I realized that when we suppress the confusing and painful truths of our lives, we also suppress God. As a result, we miss out on the good, beautiful life that comes from walking with him (Romans 8:28).

Suppressing God means when we face a challenge, we instinctively turn to our own solutions before we turn to him. We might invite him into a quiet time or a morning devotional, but we don’t invite him into our hardest moments.

We can only experience closeness with God when we open our hearts to him.

We have spoken freely to you in Corinth and have opened our hearts to you. [12] Our feelings of love for you have not stopped, but you have stopped your feelings of love for us. [13] I speak to you as if you were my children. Do to us as we have done-open your hearts to us.

2 Corinthians 6:11-13 NCV

Ignoring the painful truths of our lives is a self-reliant way to handle the hardness of life, and it keeps us emotionally stunted. When we close off what’s in our hearts, God becomes suppressed and the people around us are cut off.

On the contrary, God-reliance brings incredible resilience because he walks with us in all circumstances, even when life is incredibly hard.

My salvation and my significance depend ultimately on God; the core of my strength, my shelter, is in the True God. [8] Have faith in Him in all circumstances, dear people. Open up your heart to Him; the True God shelters us in His arms.

Psalm 62:7-8 VOICE

Opening our hearts to God brings them back to life. It is the path to discovering the strength and significance we long for.

To experience the emotional resilience of walking with God, we must face the root of many of humanity’s struggles: the hidden truths we would rather avoid.

02Reflect

Do a “God-reliance” check.

Question 1: Select the statements in each section below that describe you most accurately right now.

Self-reliance looks like this:

  • Trying to fix everything myself before asking for help
  • Feeling like I have to have answers before I can pray
  • Believing my worth depends on handling things well
  • Managing my image so people think I’m okay
  • Praying only after I’ve exhausted my own solutions
  • Feeling guilty or weak when I need help

God-reliance looks like:

  • Bringing my problems to God first, not last
  • Praying even when I don’t know what to say
  • Understanding God wants a relationship not a performance
  • Being honest about my struggles—understanding this is the “me” God wants to know.
  • Asking God for help before trying to fix things myself
  • Viewing dependence on God as strength, not weakness

Question 2: Identify one specific area where you’re still relying on yourself instead of God.

  • Finances
  • Relationships
  • Emotions
  • Reputation/image
  • Career/work/school
  • Health
  • Future/plans
  • Other

In this area, what does self-reliance look like for you day-to-day? What would God-reliance look like instead? What scares you about depending on God in this area?

Question three: What are some ways you suppress God in your life?

  • Busyness and distraction—I’m too busy to think about him.
  • My shame keeps me from approaching him.
  • My self-reliance makes me forget I need him.
  • I use entertainment to numb what he wants to heal.
  • I avoid him because I am afraid of what he might ask me to change.
  • I am exhausted. I don’t have energy for God on top of everything else.
  • Other

What would it look like to invite God into your hardest moment of each day this week—not just your quiet time, but the actual hard stuff?

What’s one way you could practice remembering God is present when life gets hard?

03Act

Practice God-reliance.

Throughout the day:
Every time the area from your reflection section comes up (your finances, your relationship, your job, etc.), practice this pattern:

  • Notice your first instinct (e.g. to fix it yourself, control it, or worry about it).
  • Stop and pray: “God, I’m bringing this to you first instead of trying to handle it myself.”
  • Ask God: “What do you want me to do? I’m depending on you, not me.”

Evening:
Pray, write, or talk with a friend about these questions: How many times did I remember to bring this area to God first? What happened when I did? What happened when I forgot and went back to self-reliance?

04Keep going

Read next

Finished Day 3?

Series · 5 days

Permission to Feel

 

Series overview
Day 0 · Open How Our Emotional Life Becomes Spiritual Day 1 · Open God-awakening Day 2 · Open Real prayers Day 3 · You’re here Emotional Resilience Day 4 · Opens Tue Awareness of Need Day 5 · Opens Wed True greatness