Episode notes
What does it actually take to lead with purpose, push through life’s toughest moments, and build a rock-solid faith that keeps you going?
You’ll hear some powerful personal stories, game-changing mindset shifts, and the kind of wisdom that makes you rethink how you approach obstacles. Whether you’re leading a team, leading yourself, or just trying to grow, this episode is packed with insights that’ll help you step up with confidence.
Scripture notes
But the fruit produced by the Holy Spirit within you is divine love in all its varied expressions: joy that overflows, peace that subdues, patience that endures, kindness in action, a life full of virtue, faith that prevails, gentleness of heart, and strength of spirit. Never set the law above these qualities, for they are meant to be limitless.
Galatians 5:22-23 TPT
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV
Transcript
Russ Ewell (22:44.244)
What are spiritual life skills? If you listened to our previous episode about how God helps us grow, it’s important for us to know what’s he trying to help us grow in and why is he trying to help us grow in it. And so in this particular episode of our podcast, I have Christian and Michelle Giron with me and Mike Query, who’s always on board to talk about what are spiritual life skills. And let me read this and then we’ll get into it. Galatians 5 22 in the Passion translation,
But the fruit produced by the Holy Spirit within you is divine love in all its varied expressions. Joy that overflows, peace that subdues, patience that endures, kindness in action, a life full of virtue, faith that prevails, gentleness of heart, and strength of spirit.
And so I want to go ahead and go to the Girons and I’ll start with you Christian and then Michelle can jump on in or if you want to reverse it you can, doesn’t matter to me. What do you think about this whole idea of spiritual life skills? Like how does that strike you? Do you think it’s important? Do you think it’s valuable? And what do you, how do you see them and how do you define them in your own?
Girons (23:47.63)
I mean, yeah, I think they’re super important. think having ADHD myself, there’s a lot of limitation I kind of already have mentally, you know? So I think there’s so many deficits I feel like I face on a day-to-day basis. Some I think about, some I don’t. So when I think of the life skills, I think honestly, the Bible has helped me develop like that scripture, a lot of life skills, like the ability to love. I don’t think I’m anywhere near where I need to be, but there’s patience, self-control.
There’s so many things that I probably wouldn’t have if I didn’t have relationship with God. So I think it’s super important to have life skills because I think there’s so many things going on and we need friends. I need people to point out truth in me that a lot of times I’m not aware of what’s really going on and how I’m doing. So I think everybody, no matter where you’re at in life, no matter how self aware you think you are, I think everyone can benefit from having this life skills for sure.
Russ Ewell (24:49.204)
What are your thoughts, Michelle?
Girons (24:51.085)
Yeah, no, I agree. As we’ve been doing these and reading the self-awareness and listening to the podcast and stuff, we’ve been having more conversations and I’m just really grateful for all the help I’ve gotten throughout the years in college and even now being a mom and learning how to juggle mom working jobs. I’m really grateful for all the help and I feel like they’re needed too because you were sharing this the last podcast, but even the limitations we come up against with ourselves, but that God helps us go further than what we think we’re capable of. And I know me and Christian both have felt that of, you know, he shared his ADHD. I also have ADHD, but the limitations that we have, but I’m just grateful because I look at how God’s already, you know, how far he already has and what’s to come. And so I think the spiritual life skills is really helpful because we all have our limitations, but I feel like God pushes you past what you think you’re capable of doing. So. She said that way better.
Russ Ewell (25:54.271)
That’s awesome. So Mike, Mike, when you’ve been working on this, how would you define spiritual life skills?
Mike Query (26:07.925)
I mean, think, man, how did Michelle just kind of put it in pretty good way? Like, God helping us grow beyond maybe what we feel like we’re capable of on our own or what our limitations are. I think meant to be limitless, like it says in Galatians, that’s really encouraging to me. I mean, I think when I think of the need for life skills, think of, you know, working on this, talking about these skills a lot has made me think about college a lot because I think in that period of my life was when I was most…
raw, needing training, felt like all over the map. I went to Santa Cruz for college and one of my apartments I lived in was off campus and it was like right where highway one, which is like a coastal drive, meets the city. So when I would get really overwhelmed with school, because I had a hard time focusing, I was kind all over the map doing stuff I shouldn’t have been doing instead of studying, I would get in my car, I’m just going to leave it like that for this podcast, but I would get in my car, had a green 97 Integra and I love that car. But man, would just hop in the car and I would just drive down highway one and just like look at the ocean. And it felt like I’m just trying to drive away from my problems right now because I just felt so overwhelmed. I needed so much help. I didn’t really know how to go about getting better grades or dealing with my feelings. You know, I had a lot of just emotions I didn’t know how to sort through. So I think that’s like a visual I have because this idea of life skills, I think there are limitations in character, kind of walls I was hitting and I didn’t know how to get through them. And I didn’t really have the spiritual or biblical foundation at the time to know how to work through them. you know, we’ll talk at some point later, like one of the life skill topics in particular that stood out to me was about time management organization.
That was the one that I was tasked with tackling because my wife Amy said, know, hey, I think that would be good for you to take on there. A little time management organization might help our home. But I’m just like, man, God helps our hearts and our spiritual lives. And from that, like he has our lives grow. And I think that’s kind of like the big thing I took away from all of these. Like there’s a spiritual need that God can meet. And from that, our lives can just flourish in a lot of different ways. So that’s my visual. And then that’s kind how I’ve been thinking about these as we been working on.
Russ Ewell (28:23.698)
Yeah, so when all three of you are talking, basically you’re saying that life skills, and the reason we call them spiritual is because we’re coming from a biblical point of view and we’re coming from an extraordinary power point of view, meaning God has extraordinary power that he puts at work in our life. Ephesians 1:19 teaches us that. And the reason being a Christian helps you get these skills is because God is at work in you, helping you get them. But let’s not be fooled. Social emotional learning in schools, is also about helping people develop these and you don’t have to be a Christian to develop life skills. It’s just you don’t and I know people might like to make that sound like that but that’s just not true. In fact, there’s a lot of things you can learn that if you pay attention to writing in the world, to YouTubes in the world, to podcasts in the world, you can learn a lot about it and so you don’t have to limit yourself to you know just the things we’re talking about.
Both Christian and Michelle have experience in education and teaching and and being support educators in classrooms in their life. And so I think an interesting thing for you guys to talk about, maybe if we zero in a little bit, if you can think back to when you were growing up, what were some of the things, who were some of the people or what were some of the situations where you actually learned? I think you both played sports, right? And for me, I was listening to Meet the Press and a Senator from Michigan was on, Senator Slotkin, she’s a woman Senator from yeah, like as I said the state of Michigan, but she talked about the fact that one of the reasons she was a leader is because she played sports growing up. I think she said she played three or four sports and that those had made her capable of being a leader. I think it’d be good for you to share because I think we have listeners out there that may be in high school, that may be in college, that are maybe, are perhaps frustrated with the things you mentioned, limitations. I heard the word overwhelmed. What were some of the things that happened to you along the way? Because you alluded to the fact that you got a lot of help. What were some of the things that helped you along the way, and what were some of those first skills that people helped you develop that began to give you hope that, I can do even more than I think I can.
Girons (30:36.963)
I mean, yeah, I can probably put out a list. the one that I, I mean, there’s several. I think the biggest one I can think of is I was in junior college at DVC and I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. So I was taking, you know, intro classes and my mentor came over. He’s an older guy that’s kind of helping me navigate life. He came on campus and he was like, hey, show me your schedule. I want to help you know how to balance everything. And I looked at him and I was like, what do you mean my schedule?
And he was like, you know, like, how do you know what you’re doing next, what you’re doing today? I was like, I don’t know. And then he was like, well, how do you function? I was like, I don’t know, whatever happens next, happens next. I was like, I was looking at him like he speaking a foreign language. And he was like, okay, like, we’re going to sit down. Here’s how you do it. Here’s how to think about it. Here’s how to like, and I never was taught that, I don’t know that’s going to be bad way, but that was probably 2012. So 12, 13 years of, I’m pretty much, mean, Michelle knows, every day I’m on my Google Calendar. If something changes, I’m like, I adjust it so I know what’s happening because otherwise I’m like, I’m all over the place, you know? So I think that’s the big thing that helped me a lot was knowing how to balance everything. Otherwise, I would probably not be getting done.
Russ Ewell (31:54.719)
Well, let me ask you a question about that. You said you’re all over the place. I think a lot of us relate to that, but just for people listening, because I think some people may go, they may not think they’re all over the place, but they may be all over the place. What does all over the place look like? I’m assuming it looks like you’re being controlled by events rather than living your life. Would that be accurate?
Girons (32:19.461)
Yeah, it’s living by what I feel, if that makes sense. Living by my emotions. Like, I feel like doing this. So I’ll go do it without thinking what are the implications. Usually that was basketball. So I’ll go to the gym and I’ll go to the… Yeah, I’ll go play. have some time. I’m not even kidding. Five hours later, was like, oh, dang it, I had homework. So I mean, all over the place is like…
Russ Ewell (32:33.748)
I can relate to that.
Girons (32:45.697)
It’s the emotions part, but it’s also just doing what I feel like doing when I want to do it. So selfishness in a way, you know, is just choosing what I want. There was a lot of ramifications for that that I wasn’t aware of. It helped me know like, okay, where do I need to spend my time? What’s prioritizing things? I still get help with that today. I have lot of different things. Like, what do I prioritize? What’s the best? So I think that’s what I would mean by that.
Russ Ewell (33:09.598)
So when I’m listening to you, what I’m hearing you say is that a life skill is something that helps you manage your emotions. And that if you don’t have something that, it may be time management.
Girons (33:19.663)
No, definitely.
Russ Ewell (33:24.36)
But it may be something else. There are other life skills that we went crazy and as I created the matrix for it and I over complicate everything. But there’s 20 different things in there, 20 different items and 20 different qualities. And so some of you may go, well, I don’t have a problem with time management. But the point to learn from what Christian’s saying is that when you develop a skill, it can help you manage something in your life. It might be your emotions. It might be your relationships. It might be the complexity of what you’re studying in school. You, I know you, have a background in being a school psychologist, which means that a lot of your work is even helping people evaluate where they are, strengths and weaknesses, and how they attack this thing. And so maybe you can speak to that. And I’d like you to speak really to not just our younger people, but just people in general, because older, those who are older, I’m older than all you guys maybe combined, I can’t remember. But the thing about, I think a lot of older people is they think they’ve got all their skills together because they’ve managed to get their career going, get a home, etc. But then a kid comes along, or a second kid comes along, or a third kid comes along, or even retirement comes along.
And that’s when we’re challenged to develop new ones. So maybe you can talk about the mentality people have, the challenges they face, and why looking at this subject is so important.
Girons (34:54.519)
Yeah, well, the word I kept thinking about, even with your last question, was developing resilience and not quitting. Because I think and the self-awareness piece, honestly, that we just looked at of looking at, OK, where am I at in my life? I think it’s easy to just be like, let’s just in the stage of life that we’re in with working and having a kid, it’s like, OK, how do we survive?
Russ Ewell (35:20.444)
Yeah, 100%.
Girons (35:20.997)
That’s like not what God has planned for us. But I don’t always look at, I think back to college and I’m like, I actually had the same mindset in college. It was different, like, you know, but I kind of was like, how do I just survive through this final? And I end up missing a lot. Like, how is God currently, what is God currently trying to teach me and what do I need to develop in this stage of life? And even to answer your question, the first one.
Mike Query (35:21.133)
Right. Yep. Yep.
Girons (35:49.554)
I was thinking of resilience because I feel like it actually started back to my parents are very hard workers. And I do feel like that’s something that I was like looking back on the life skill. Resilience is a life skill and pushing through things and working through things. So I feel like I can see along the way God teaching me different life skills and that being one of them. But I think it’s important. Yeah, what you said at every stage, because I feel in a different way, I’m now able to do some of the things I did in college easily, but now I’m in a different stage of life where I’m trying to manage, you know, a job and a kid in the home and so it’s humility, I think is big, asking for help. I think you said this, allowing people to train you, allowing God to train you. And that that’s actually like the blessings come in that too, because I also look at all the training.
It’s only benefited, right? It doesn’t always feel good when I’m getting help or when I feel like it’s more vulnerable to when you’re like, I don’t know how to life. I always look at it afterwards and I’m like, my gosh, look at all the blessings that came from it or how we grew out of it. And so I don’t know if that answered your question?
Russ Ewell (37:03.06)
Oh, it totally answers the question. You know, I was watching a CEO on a podcast and he said, I have ADHD. And he goes, what I am is a professional quitter. And I went, wow, that’s intense. But it wasn’t like, I don’t think people with ADHD are the only professional quitters. I think professional quitting is a profession. It takes all kinds, all types, all colors, all languages. But what you just address with resilience is a skill which is, and I don’t like failing and I don’t like losing, but that’s an essential part of developing the character that will eventually get you to a point where you can win. And so I think it’s a really good point you’re making.
So in this podcast, what we want to do is keep it simple for everybody. I think what we’ve learned talking to Christian and Michelle, talking to Mike, is a spiritual life skill is something that allows you to be empowered in the area of your life where you may feel there’s some weakness or just an area where you may not even be a weakness. It may be an area of your life where you want to get better because your goals have grown. As Michelle talked about, I remember one of my best friends, close friends in life or really a mentor in life was Al Baird and is Al Baird. And he said to me once, said, know, Russ, the thing about life is that wherever you are at today, in whatever circumstances you’re in, you’ve never been there before.
And so, if you’re 70 or 75 or 55, you’ve never been there before. So there’s skills that you haven’t developed well enough, and that’s why the series can be good for you. If you’re young in life and you’re in high school or you’re in college and you flunked a class or you’re doing bad or you’re getting your worst grades or your dating life’s going badly for you, you have to look and say, okay, this is an opportunity for me to grow and that God has opened the door for me to grow. I think we can end with this scripture, 2 Corinthians 12, 9, but he said to me, my grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ’s power may rest on me. Our weaknesses are God’s opportunity.
And so when you look at what are spiritual life skills, they’re the skills you develop to help you not be overwhelmed. They’re the skills that help you develop, that you want to get help developing, and that if you develop they can help you overcome emotional challenges. Meaning when life is a bleak and overwhelming, spiritual life skills are skills you can use to improve your relationship, to handle having one new kid, or two new kids, or three new kids.
And then if we look at all those skills and all those abilities, we can have hope that whether we’re a student, whether we’re a professional, whether we’re as Christian and Michelle are talking about, we’re new parents or whether we’re veterans of however many kids and grandchildren we have, every situation we’re in is an opportunity to grow and gain new skills. Thanks for listening to the podcast. Remember to like and subscribe our podcast help us get to more and more people and look out for our next podcast, which is How Does Spiritual Life Skills Change Our Lives?
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About the show
The Deep Spirituality Podcast is a show about having spiritual conversations. Join our Editor-in-Chief Russ Ewell and guests as they have candid discussions on spiritual topics ranging from faith to anxiety to vulnerability, inspiring you to go deeper in your relationship with God and have challenging and honest conversations of your own.
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